Coachella, the music festival that started out fairly popular and blew up into a cultural phenomenon/beacon of basic-ness (props to this Basic Bitches’ Guide to Coachella for keeping it real), is like that tropical vacation/cruise you take with your family every few years; It’s the only time your dad ever wears a Hawaiian shirt, and you say nothing because it’s a cruise and, well, when in Rome, right? And because he bought your ticket.
Something about Coachella (and music festivals in general) inspires people to dress atypically. And by atypically, I mean in a way that exemplifies cultural appropriation. The irony is that everyone pretty much dresses the same. There’s an emphasis on hippy culture and ambiguous tribal imagery, and about 25% of festival-goers actually think they’re at a rave (easy mistake in L.A.).
Here are some things we’ve learned over the years, evidence that cultural appropriation is cool when music and drugs are involved:
Not only are flower crowns acceptable, but size doesn’t matter. If you want to wear what equates to a Polynesian headdress, go for it. (For some reason, my friends really resent me for naming this one).
Crop tops: The higher, the better–beer belly be damned. (Same rule applies to your state of mind).
Fringe & crochet like your life depends on it.
If you’re not rolling, you’re doing it wrong.
Long peasant skirts: The most skin you’ll be covering all weekend.
If you only know the lyrics to that one song, it’s totes OK, because apparently 75% of the audience also only knows the lyrics to that one song.
AZTEC PRINT EVERYTHING. Or go big, bold, and offensive with a Native American headdress.
Face paint/adornment, such as a Bindi. Is this offensive? Probably. Maybe. We don’t know.
If it’s not on Instagram, it didn’t happen/If it’s not on a style blog, your outfit didn’t happen.
Don’t wear neon unless you’re really looking to expose your basic-ness.
I’m thankful to friends and blogs and Instagram accounts for all of this valuable info so that if I ever choose to pony up the money to be hammered, high, and half-naked in the desert, I’ll know exactly what to buy and can look forward to a tax-deductible receipt from Goodwill in the week after my return.
For more of a peek at Coachella fashion trends, head to POPSUGAR. There’s nothing like Coachella to serve as my annual reminder that I’m on the wrong coast–and I say that with love.